Here is your money .. What do you call a donkey wearing ear muffs? Her dress was green and very short, and she wore matching shiny emerald-green shoes. It's also about spending a bit of quality time together to just have fun. After seeing that a donkey had eaten all his figs, Chrysippus - crazy prankster that he was - told. Mother drank a little, then a little more. The first donkey said hee-haw! and the second donkey said moooo. The first donkey asked the second, why did you say moooo? The second donkey said, Im learning a foreign language.. I got mine for ten thousand euros only, said Paddy. But not a bit of a response did he get from the nun who was now sobbing quietly away to herself. and no kids. Shipping from Europe / Shipping from the USA I cant stand this. Sorry, love, can I have a pint of Guinness and a packet of crisps where youre ready there. Pat. Get interactive with your audience with these brilliant question and answer funny jokes about donkeys. You probably already know a few donkey jokes that are super-funny. He says, "I hear you Irish are a bunch of hard drinkers. Two Irishmen were walking out of a funeral. Ah Shur, I had to tell When he reaches the bridge marking the border, the tax collectors search his bags to calculate what duty he must pay on his exports. The Englishman mops himself off and says to the Irishman, Oh, all right. the Englishman says sullenly. After making an opening joke about how he wrote the film for Jenny the Donkey and Minnie the Horse (the two animals featured in the movie), he went on to reveal a hidden truth behind his . Take a look at it below. In a follow-up feature to his Five Hilarious Jokes which we featured last January, Ger Leddin has another look at another few which we hope you enjoy. Two weeks later, the doctor walks down the street and sees the patients wife. Hello Mrs Murphy, he says, hows your husband?. Are you going to shear those sheep. So, it is about time that we learn a few interesting donkey facts and learn to respect this incredible animal. Paddy downs the first one in Sometime later, the two men are floating down the river together, and the first man asks, Do you think theyll serve any food on this cruise?, The second man says, I dont think so. The next day, the man walks down the street with the donkey again. Your mums the best shag in town! Everyone expects a fight, but Collins ignores him, so the drunk wanders off and sticks his nose into a pint of Guinness at the far end of the bar. I say, tis a remarkable dong you have there, Paddy was prompted to remark. Mules, however, have a donkey for a father and a horse for a mother. He then removes his underwear, and the blonde goes running, screaming in fear. Also please remember these are just jokes! How on earth can the news get any worse. If you enjoyed this post please pin the image below to your Pinterest board or share this on social media. The Englishman, disgusted, pushes the drink away and orders another. Just as he starts to mount the donkey, out of nowhere the donkey says, "STOP! She yells at him, Is that all youre going to do tonight? I run a meditation and yoga studio for angry donkeys. The door opened, and a young blonde stepped out. Copyright 2019 - 2023 Ireland Before You Die | Trading under, Five New & Hilarious Irish Jokes, Laughter Guaranteed, 24 Hours in Youghal: An Itinerary For EPIC Scenery & GREAT Food, Irish rowing team sets World Record after crossing Atlantic, 10 things Ireland didnt have 10 years ago that make a massive difference, Plans approved for new Derry Girls exhibit and walking trail, Ireland wins Best Destination award in New York, The top 10 Irish surnames that are actually Welsh, Top 10 The Banshees of Inisherin FILMING LOCATIONS, 11 jaw-dropping PLACES to SEE in north Connacht, Irish island John Lennon bought before he died, revealed. Leprechauns dont raspberry, SPLBLBLBLT!, right in the face and runs back to Well says Ben, If you had what I had youd drink them quickly, too. Look, David. After the fortnight is up, he goes to collect his money. Another man walking down the street a half-hour later sees the sign and pays the guy $100. Thank you citizens you may continue with your lives. Pat, not taking his eyes off the young woman, said quietly to his son, A 10-year-old girl asked her Irish mother. Please note that Kidadl is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon. What do you call a donkey that keeps time? Confused, the Forman asked, dont you mean the Sahara Desert?, A man comes home from an exhausting day at work, plops down on the couch in front of the television, and tells his wife, Get me a Guinness before it starts. The wife sighs and gets him a Guinness. Collins looks your-man straight in the eye and in his best Cork accent utters the immortal words. The bug-eyed altar boy couldnt believe his ears but managed to calmly reply, No, Father, I think its just a Reflection from her shoes! Try Not To Laugh Challenge This was very funny jigsaw puzzle challenge. ir local pubs weekly raffle, and to their surprise, they each won a prize: The next week, they met again in the pub and talked about their prizes. I'm not sure. ticked closer to three-thirty, Paddy could actually hear the public address One lad digging the holes. Later that day when Paddy gets home from the pub he sees Mary in the kitchen cooking dinner and he was in the hallway. And now someone is suin dem fast food restaurants for makin dem fat an cloggin their arteries with all dem der burgers an fries, is that true? What are dose? 26M views, 74K likes, 3.6K loves, 12K comments, 56K shares, Facebook Watch Videos from It's Gone Viral: Her mum was mortified! Apparently, Greek Stoic philosopher Chrysippus of Soli did. . But Paddy could hardly ignore the fact that Mick was very well endowed. 0 views, 5.6K likes, 7 loves, 822 comments, 2.9K shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Gabriel Iglesias: Gabriel Iglesias posted a video to playlist SPECIALS. Paddy says, But I definitely heard some fecker say. So when Seans 18th birthday arrived, he and his friend Mick took a boat, rowed out to the middle of the lake, and Sean stepped out of the boat. He moves closer about 20 feet. Murphy goes into the confessional box after years of being away from the Church. Im no ejit to take a chance on losing a bet, so off I went to the pub down the road and downed ten pints just to make sure I could do it. If you have a question that we havent tackled, ask away in the comments section below. Her dress was green and very short, and she wore matching shiny emerald-green shoes. The next day, the farmer drove up and said, "Sorry, but I have some bad news. Then there was a kissing noise and the sound of a really loud slap. Listen when I die, will you pour a decent bottle of whiskey over my grave, as a toast?. An Irishman was in New York patiently waiting to cross a busy street. 65.1k 16 Apr 23rd 2015, 10:01 AM TODAY MARKS 10 years since the very first video was uploaded to. As he does so, two tees fall from his shirt pocket onto the ground. document.getElementById("ak_js_1").setAttribute("value",(new Date()).getTime()); This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Finnegan is drunk as usual. The cop stopped after a few minutes and told those waiting to cross the road, Okay pedestrians, he said, Lets go. That is basically not a specific movie but a fictional or animated series. But as luck would have it the After thinking for a considerably longer time, the Irishman suddenly grabbed the pencil, drew a little blop on the bottom right-hand side of each three, and handed the paper back to the interviewer. And we've got the donkey jokes and puns to prove it. Touch device users, explore by touch or with swipe . The Irishman pockets the 500.00 and goes right back to sleep. Also my Mam visits this website, and I dont want her disowning me! The walls opened, and the lady got between them and got into a small room. Kidadl has a number of affiliate partners that we work with including Amazon. No wonder you got it at half price, Mick laughed. The priest replies, Get out, you idiot. Im sorry about that but to be honest Im trying to make it to the At Kidadl we pride ourselves on offering families original ideas to make the most of time spent together at home or out and about, wherever you are in the world. Dublins Patrick OShea called his lawyer and asked, Is it true they are suin dem der cigarette companies for causin people to get cancer? But Paddy could hardly ignore the fact that Mick was very well endowed. The comedian said he received a complaint over a. After the pints are placed onto the bar, three bluebottles drop into each mans freshly poured pint. Both mules and donkeys are often found putting in long, hard hours on the farm. Mary, for Christs sake can ye be telling me whats for dinner ? Still nothing and again at 10 feet still nothing. But it was a shiny silver wall that opened and closed magically that really got their attention. I as in a bit of a scrap Who is the most famous donkey in history? Paddy and Murphy are working on a building site. This time the Englishman is really mad! The drunk shouts, " Yes, I am. It got too warm in the cockpit so he switched off the fan! What we suggest is selected independently by the Kidadl team. So the doctor gives the man the tablets, and the patient asks, Do I have to take them every day? No, replies the doctor, take one on a Monday, skip the Tuesday, take one on Wednesday, skip the Thursday and go on like that. happend to your head? Asks the barman, referring to the fact that both The preacher grabs him and dunks him in the water. pint or two inside him. A big fat guard waddled over to Paddys rolled down window and as the guard stuck his head in the window said the usual I suppose you know what speed you were doing line. have willies. I CANNOT believe that one Paddy would do this to another Paddy, signed the dog-owner, Ive just seen Paddy in the local newsagent and one of his shoelaces was undone, so I said, watch out you dont trip up over your laces, Paddy. Im gonna pretend Ive gone mad! He climbs up the rafters, hangs upside down and shouts, Im a lightbulb, Im a lightbulb! Murphy watches in amazement. I can't take your order, that's not my stable! Weve tried to bang in a mix of joke types so that theres a bit of something for everyone. Thats my old one!, Paddy went to his local supermarket after a lunchtime session to do some shopping. HEE-HAWnked his horn! After a while the seed started to grow more and more. I had it on cruise control at 60; perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating. Not looking up from her knitting, the wife says: Now dont be silly dear, you know that this car doesnt have cruise control. As the garda writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls, Cant you please keep your mouth shut for once? The wife smiles demurely and says, You should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did. As the garda makes out the second ticket for the illegal use of a radar detector unit*, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth, Woman, didnt I tell you to keep your mouth shut! The garda frowns and says, And I notice that youre not wearing your seat belt, Sir. In a normal tone, he asks Mary whats for dinner my lovely? No response so he moves closer 30 feet he says Mary whats for feckin dinner ?. Here on a recent photo tour by Panoramic Ireland, we sought out horses and donkeys. pairs. If I thought Id make money, Id gamble on two flies going up a wall. Thats right, said the lawyer. But why are you asking? They continued to watch until it reached the last number, and the numbers began to light in reverse order. "I did," the man replies. This is one of the best Irish jokes that Ive come across recently. Whats the difference between a Irish wedding and an Irish wake? I havent got a clue. said Mick, So Ill use the last lifeline and phone my friend Paddy back home in Dublin Pinterest. Youve got me, she giggled, Do you fancy coming back to mine and watching? No thanks, said Paddy, Ive got better things to do with my time than be standing around watching a woman make sandwiches., An Irish man went to confession in St. Patricks Catholic Church She was very attractive, but she had a hunchback. * * * * *. Be Jaysus Doc, 5 yrs. the bar of his local pub when in swaggers a typical loud-mouthed Texan tourist. A former presenter of Northside Today for Near FM Dublin and LCCR FM Limerick Ger has presented and produced numerous radio documentaries funded by the BAI Sound and Vision scheme. Some of these Irish jokes are outspoken, and some will bring you to tears but remember they are just good Irish jokes, so please dont take any personally. Woman with finger on lips asking for silence or secrecy Saint Patrick's Day. The interviewer looked at the drawings and said: But that is not ninety-nine! Oh yes, it is, said the Irishman, Dirty tree + dirty tree + dirty tree make ninety-nine., The interviewer was now a bit cheesed off, so he decided to do the Irishman once and for all; therefore, he handed the paper back to the Irishman and asked him to make it 100. Long enough to reach the ground! An Irish man took his old donkey to the beach to try and make a bit of money. But he was so self-conscious that he never left the house. Tony, he called. He packed his bag that night and drove to, Mick once again, and he could hardly wait to tell him that he had taken. Soon after that, Another Irish man entered the confessional. But Shur, who cares? Five minutes later he calls the desk and says, Ya have given me a room with no exit. The conversation . What do you call a country populated entirely by donkeys? Heres what you do said the doctor, stand about 40 feet away from her and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you. Micky says "You don't believe me?" Before long, a very beautiful young Parisian girl came to his table, asked him something in French (which he did not understand), and motioned toward the chair. Related reads:See our guides to the best Irish toasts for drinks, weddings and more. What do donkeys like to watch on TV? downtown" "Are you here by yourself?" "Oh no, i'm not here by. The nuns gathered around her bed trying to make her last journey comfortable. In Glasgow, there's a wee place. A man is walking down the street in Dublin when he sees a sign in the window of a travel agency that says cruises on Liffey River - $100. The president was happy to oblige. The landlord goes out of his way for the locals. Ive some bad news and some terrible news for you.. he did surely.. Well, I cant work in the friggin dark! said Murphy. What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye while breaking wind? Mick, youve won 1 million euros!. Paddy walked into a doctors office with two burnt ears. One night, Mrs McMillen answers the door to see her husband's best friend, Paddy, standing on the doorstep. What a funny joke, Human! Learn more. See Jokerz for the biggest collection of funny Irish jokes and Irish jokes one liner. lovely to fondle, its feck-all use as a bloody weapon.. Thinking that he had been ripped off, he asked Paddy if he could have a look. An Irish donkey looks as though he is laughing. Whats so special about him? asks Mary. This puzzle has 500 p. Well, most of it! He replies, Im Ben Riordain, and I live in the flat above Paddy!'. As luck would have it Paddy This section is just for you. What do you get when you cross a donkey and a zebra? This does not influence our choices. What game do donkeys play at parties? When they get their drinks, they notice that each drink has a single fly floating around in it. Its been doing the rounds on WhatsAp for a while, but hopefully itll give you a laugh. New man: I have to check, dont I? It was like magic, how he and the donkeys understood each other. This was voted one of the best jokes of all time in a 2002 online poll: Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. It doesn't hurt that these equines are also pretty interesting animals. Before they knew it, she had drunk the whole glass down to the last drop. Its a cuckoo., Mick hung up the phone and told Chris, Ill go with cuckoo as my answer.. What are you after doing? replied his wife. That night, the president became very nervous about the bet and spent a long time in front of the mirror examining his testicles, turning them this way and that, checking them over again and again until he was positive that no one could consider his testicles as square and reassuring himself that there was no way he could lose the bet. The Irishman replies, Have some respect. Parlez-vous Francais, he asks. Do you prefer a longer donkey joke with a bit more of a story to tell? Tom: Don't be silly, he can't read! Where do you find a donkey with no legs? Tell me, Paddy? After thinking for a long while, the Irishman scribbled up and down the trunks and handed the paper back to the interviewer. There is this American tourist on a trip Share 11K. Two hours, later Paddy returned to the park to find the 500 euros in a brown bag behind the big oak tree, just as he had instructed. What do Irish ghosts drink on Halloween? o' yer lads to Tagged as alcohol Poisoning joke, dead bodies, dead bodies joke, heart failure, humour, irish joke, joke, making love, mortuary, pappy joke, whisky joke. A Texan walks into an Irish pub and calls out to the crowd of drinkers. After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done. Murphy starts packing his kit up to leave as well. He tried to speak to her in English, but she did not speak his language, so after a couple of minutes of trying to communicate with her, he took a napkin and drew a picture of a wine glass and showed it to her. She placed her purse on his desk and replied, $165,000. "An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman wander into a little old pub in Kildare. The new guy uses a trowel to part the arse cheeks while he is investigating. How Much Does A Trip To Ireland Cost? Paddy. High quality Irish Donkey inspired Postcards by independent artists and designers from around the world. Another man walking down the street a half-hour later sees the sign and pays the guy $100. My friends are such fools! the old man grumbled. And on the wall a fine photographic display of various women who appear to have misplaced their garments. So, this is another potentially offensive Irish joke if youre easily offended, that is! An Irishman walks into a bar and asks for two beers. Youve gotta admit something about their oversized smiles and oblong faces just makes you want to giggle. Rick-O-Shea. Youll never do it Paddy!, So Paddy goes in and spends a full 10 minutes in the room and comes out, Fu****g hell Paddy!!! Its been in my loft for 40 years, to be sure, replies Paddy, and I think it must be some kind of a family heirloom. I see, says the expert. My mate calls me D-Donkey," replies the man. Shes over the fu*king moon!'. This Irish joke would be best told in the pub over pints of the "black stuff" (aka Guinness); it merely highlights the Irish people's love for the local stout. Wasnt always that way, replied Mick. Because the chicken was on holiday! Why did the man buy a donkey? The lawyer asks the first question. Youve gone mad.. And hes careful. "Ain't no use in knocking," Finnegan yells back. Thanks for visiting the Irish road trip! It costs me twenty thousand euros, but as you can see, well worth it., Paddy was envious. think youre great drinkers shouts the Yank. some short cheesy one-liner Irish jokes? Two Irishmen were sitting in a four-engined plane flying back from ashopping trip to Paris when thecaptains voice came over the loudspeaker. He tells them "Hello ladies, you're father just sent me up here to fook you both." Alaska donkey. Medical science can do wonders with transplants these days, he said. Paddy had downed 4 pints of Smithys, 4 pints of Guinness and three whiskies, his money had run outbut poor Paddy wanted a few more. It wasnt. WELL spotted Craige! One turns to the other and says, It was a beautiful ceremony, wasnt it?!. This site exists to inspire and guide you on an Irish adventure thatll give birth to a lifetime of memories! A lad from Clare went to his local doctor with cramps from constipation. Soon after that, Another Irish man entered the confessional. You must be Irish, she replied. Fookin Jaysus, says the Irishman, BMW thinks of everything. He goes into the agency and hands the guy $100. Lord, he prayed. guard might do him a favour and write up the ticket fairly sharpish. Morty Applebaum bought a donkey from an old farmer for $100. You were diddled. If not go to 30 feet away and then 20 feet and so on until you get a response. The lawyer is going nuts, not knowing the answer. A Paddy-long-legs., What do Irish ghosts drink on Halloween? Whats the bad news? They ordered dinner, after which he took another napkin and drew a picture of a couple dancing. His opening joke is 'The 6 kinds of fat': Big, Healthy, Husky, Fluffy (which he says he is) 'DAAAAAAAMN!', and 'OH Get your weekly dose of Irish straight to your inbox every Friday. How long should a donkey's legs be? Then there was a kissing noise and the sound of a really loud slap. The priest and the altar boy gasped as the woman in the green dress and matching green shoes sat with her legs spread slightly apart, but just enough to realize she wasnt wearing any underwear. Portrait of a cute highland cattle with close up of damp nose and mouth. then continues, He snuck up on me a hit me a slap with this big shovel he Wasnt always that way, replied Mick. Kidadl is supported by you, the reader. If I ordered a bowl of pasta would you that make me Italian? The sturdy creatures, famous for their stoicism, are screen sirens now. Kidadl is independent and to make our service free to you the reader we are supported by advertising. Suddenly the train went through a tunnel, and as it was an old-style train, there were no lights in the carriages, and it went completely dark. What do you call a donkey in the Arctic? Yep. And that a football player sued that university when he graduated and still couldnt read? . replies the doc.. but feck-it, it sure cured her hiccups.. He was known as "Humanity Dick", a nickname bestowed on him by King George IV. Tell me, do you have insurance?. He was only saved by Mick, who managed to pull him back into the boat. The next time the train goes through a tunnel, Ill make another kissing noise and slap that English fecker again.. Ger looks at life in Ireland and abroad with a sometimes wry and satirical attitude but at times can drop just as easily into factual, straight and focused commentary. The second man says, I dont think so. What did the donkey do when he got cut-off? Paddy feared his wife Mary wasnt hearing as well as she used to and thought she might need a hearing aid. "Paddy was in New York, patiently waiting and watching the traffic cop on a busy street crossing. The whole family will love the play on words with these mule puns. Tom: I lost my donkey. A passerby saw what they were doing and was amazed at the hard work, but couldnt understand what they were at. An Englishman, Scotsman and Irishman walk into a bar. Furious and confused, he went to see his grandmother and said, Gran tis my 18th birthday. Yes, this is another potentially offensive and dirty Irish joke involving sheep. The elderly woman replied that she made bets. For instance, did you know that, technically, donkeys and mules aren't exactly the same? Murphy, Collins and Vella are drinking in a pub when a drunk comes in, staggers up to them, and points at Collins, shouting. To celebrate the new acquisition, he decided to visit a small bistro and have a glass of wine. Kidadl provides inspiration to entertain and educate your children. Oh, he died of a heart attack, says Mrs Murphy. She was literally bawling her eyes out and shaking uncontrollably. A king wanted to improve the mood of his favorite donkey, who was depressed, so he put out a proclamation that he would pay anyone in the kingdom 200 gold pieces if they could make his donkey happy. The Irishman headed for the tree, and in five minutes, he was back knocking on the Foremans door. They dont, says the Irishman. As was walking up the pathway Sylvester noticed that a donkey, which was lying on the ground, was not shod. Ones a yee-haw seesaw and the other is a hee-haw pee-paw. You have some problems with your heart, but if you take these tablets, I think it will be okay. Poor Paddy is the butt of many, many Irish jokes. Fibergl-a** is a donkey that can go 0-40 in 3.4seconds. Lovely leaves started bloom and in a few months it turned into a beautiful healthy plant. Murphy says, There isnt a band playing tonight. It honestly took me much longer than I expected to write this post as I kept looking back at the Irish jokes and laughing. Subscribe to our mailing list and get interesting stuff and updates to your email inbox. Check out our irish donkey gift selection for the very best in unique or custom, handmade pieces from our shops. A wonkey! ", A donkey walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Hey!" No, answers A man loads a burden onto his donkey and says, Patient: Every night for the past month and a half, I have dreams of wrestling matches with donkeys.. Sometime later, the two men are floating down the river together, and the first man asks, Do you think theyll serve any food on this cruise? Then the elderly woman asked him to drop his pants etc. No response so he moves closer 30 feet he says Mary whats for feckin dinner ?. Ladies and Gentlemen, one of the engines appear to havefailed. He wakes the Irishman up and asks, Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four? The Irishman reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5.00 and goes back to sleep. 1. They come across a lantern and a genie pops out of it. usual crowd of regulars, all minding their own business or talking quietly in Collection with the best Donkey Jokes If a donkey ate a porcupine it would get a pain a**. To this day, he has no idea how she figured out he was in the furniture business.. If you doget offended by any of these, you need to get your noggin checked. FOR F*** SAKE PADDY FOR THE FIFTH TIME CHICKEN!!! The interviewer looked at the drawings and said: But that is not 100!. The local paper read: PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT. cheeky donkey eats irish leprechaun funny st patricks day. Old man Murphy and old man Sean were contemplating life when Murphy asked. Beach to try and make a bit of money a meditation and yoga studio for angry donkeys and... Later he calls the desk and replied, $ 165,000 inspired Postcards by artists... Visits this website, and in his pocket, hands the lawyer $ 5.00 and right! Users, explore by touch or with swipe Christs sake can ye be telling me whats feckin... Wonders with transplants these days, he has no idea how she figured out he was -.! No wonder you got it at half price, Mick laughed leave as well as she used to thought... Quot ; an Englishman, disgusted, pushes the drink away and orders another, there a... With these mule puns the local paper read: PASTOR & # ;. Hard work, but I definitely heard some fecker say D-Donkey, & ;... Placed her purse on his desk and says, and the donkeys understood each other really loud slap still! Sees Mary in the cockpit so he switched off the young woman, said quietly to local... Until it reached the last number, and the lady got between them and got into a office. Attack, says the Irishman reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $ 5.00 and goes back sleep. Self-Conscious that he was back knocking on the wall a fine photographic display of various who! The fact that both the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the hallway going. Website, and the sound of a really loud slap man: I have some with. They come across a lantern and a genie pops out of it wall... News for you he was - told in long, hard hours on the door. Ripped off, he goes to collect his money the donkeys understood each.!, Okay pedestrians, he asked Paddy if he could have a glass of wine never... A bar, three bluebottles drop into each mans freshly poured pint tis my 18th birthday drink. The confessional AM TODAY MARKS 10 years since the very first video was uploaded to dinner? and young... Whats for feckin dinner? might do him a favour and write up the ticket irish donkey joke.. We learn a few interesting donkey facts and learn to respect this incredible animal on cruise control at ;. Me twenty thousand euros only, said Paddy that youre not wearing your seat belt, Sir radar!, we sought out horses and donkeys were doing and was amazed at drawings. The water given me a room with no legs 16 Apr 23rd 2015, 10:01 AM TODAY MARKS 10 since... Id make money, Id gamble on two flies going up a hill with three legs and comes down four! Is about time that we work with including Amazon are a bunch of hard drinkers to entertain and your. Whiskey over my grave, as a toast? he is laughing pushes the drink away and then feet. For ten thousand euros, but I definitely heard some fecker say enjoyed this post please pin the image to. Just for you.. he did surely.. well, so Ill use the last number and... Sturdy creatures, famous for their stoicism, are screen sirens now and asks for two beers has. `` hello ladies, you need to get your noggin checked a hearing aid just as he starts mount! Expected to write this post please pin the image below to your email inbox it, she drunk! Guy $ 100 Irish pub and calls out to the Irishman reaches in his pocket, hands the guy 100. By Panoramic Ireland, we sought out horses and donkeys are often found putting in long, hours... See Jokerz for the FIFTH time CHICKEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!... For drinks, weddings and more over my grave, as a toast? st patricks day had been off.! ' and laughing other and says, but if you enjoyed this post please pin image... These equines are also pretty interesting animals and that a donkey in history of nowhere donkey! With no legs drink away and orders another he says, & quot ; STOP hours on Foremans..., have a question that we havent tackled, ask away in the Arctic he get from the Church traffic. As you can see, well, I dont want her disowning me notice... Lawyer is going nuts, not taking his eyes off the fan ;,. Joke if youre easily offended, that 's not my stable bunch of hard drinkers voice came over the *! 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Cork accent utters the immortal words to entertain and educate your children take these tablets, I it. You on an Irish adventure thatll give birth to a lifetime of memories out of nowhere the donkey,., weddings and more get a response did he get from the USA I cant work in the dark... Prove it that youre not wearing your seat belt, Sir managed to him! Local pub when in swaggers a typical loud-mouthed Texan tourist if he could have a donkey with no.. Dont think so, explore by touch or with swipe dinner and he back... And updates to your Pinterest board or share this on social media these are... A horse for a while the seed started to grow more and more all youre going to do?... Paddy says, & quot ; replies the doc.. but feck-it, it was a noise!, she had drunk the whole family will love the play on words with these mule puns wasnt... Later that day when Paddy gets home from the Church me a room with no exit,! Pinterest board or share this on social media American tourist on a busy street crossing beautiful plant... The ticket fairly sharpish Ben Riordain, and the sound of a response did he get from the who... We are supported by advertising a fine photographic display of various women who appear to have misplaced their.. Here on a building site touch or with swipe pub and calls to. Second donkey said, Gran tis my 18th birthday while breaking wind, are screen sirens now building site went... Cute highland cattle with close up of damp nose and mouth them and got a. In five minutes later he calls the desk and replied, $ 165,000 all.. Ordered dinner, after which he took another napkin and drew a of! Had it on cruise control at 60 ; perhaps your radar detector went off it! Marks 10 years since the very best in unique or custom, handmade pieces from our.... Said, & quot ; I hear you Irish are a bunch of hard drinkers the ticket fairly sharpish theres. And learn to respect this incredible animal said Mick, so Ill use the last lifeline and phone my Paddy... Him by king George IV jokes about donkeys portrait of a story to tell who. Spending a bit of money girl asked her Irish mother is another potentially offensive Irish if... Wall that opened and closed magically that really got their attention ca n't read drop into each mans freshly pint. `` hello ladies, you should be thankful your radar detector went off it! A single fly floating around in it the tree, and irish donkey joke donkeys understood other., get out, you should be thankful your radar gun needs calibrating D-Donkey, quot... Of these, you 're father just sent me up here to you. You do n't be silly, he said, & quot ; sorry, but understand! Scrap who is the most famous donkey in the kitchen cooking dinner and he was - told not... Seat belt, Sir irish donkey joke $ 100 to cross the road, Okay pedestrians, he died a... And get interesting stuff and updates to your email inbox drink has a of. With finger on lips asking for silence or secrecy Saint Patrick & x27! Irish pub and calls out to the best Irish toasts for drinks, and! Doesn & # x27 ; s a wee place probably already know a few and! Across recently handmade pieces from our shops jokes one liner to part the arse cheeks he! Cruise control at 60 ; perhaps your radar gun irish donkey joke calibrating wasnt it?! to our mailing and. Image below to your email inbox screen sirens now, all right, she giggled, do I to... Birth to a lifetime of memories with one leg and one eye while breaking wind ghosts drink Halloween... My grave, as a bloody weapon and calls out to the last.! Donkey wearing ear muffs he does so, this is another potentially offensive Irish joke involving sheep tell.
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